'Twas The Orgasm Before Christmas

recipe description

It's the holiday season so what could be better than a holiday themed hysterical literature? Only a Grinch wouldn't enjoy listening to a Christmas story being read by a sexy lady with a Hitachi betwixt her legs. If you attempt this bake, I promise you won't end up on Santa's Naughty List.

baking directions

1) Find a copy of 'Twas The Night Before Christmas by Clement Clarke Moore. I know everybody has a favorite Christmas story but this one is in the public domain so there's no copyright issues to worry about. Use the full unabridged version. You can find it in several formats online at: http://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/17135

For the full authentic experience, tho, I'd prefer you to have an actual physical copy of the story. You can find it for about $5 at Amazon or any physical bookseller.

2) Set the mood. Lay next to your tree. Wrap some lights around your bedpost. Simply wear a Santa hat. Whatever you want to do to get into the holiday spirit.

3) Have your favorite Hitachi/Doxy/strong buzzy toy ready to go.

4) Turn on aforementioned buzzy toy and place it upon your nethers.

5) Start reading.

6) You CANNOT remove the toy from between your legs the entire time you're reading. You also CANNOT orgasm until you have finished the story. Don't make Santa check his list twice.

7) Read until the end, then you're free to cum as long and as hard as you'd like.

8) After that, it's happy Christmas to all and to all a good night.


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Book has arrived! Expect your video within the next week. :D

Ho ho ho, I am quite excited to shoot this! I'll be ordering a book from Amazon for this one. Stay tuned. :D

Book is here! Make sure to assign bounties to me to see the video as soon as it's released!

Just ordered the book! It should arrive on Monday! I'll start baking it once it gets here :)

OMG this sounds great!! I have a couple vids of me reading stories on my Pornhub but none with a vibrator!


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